Administrative actions to renovate result in corruption

As school administration faces ongoing challenges this year regarding the return of in-school learning, faculty members have adjusted by implementing new ways for students to learn in school and stay safe. However, students and parents have indicated that these enactments have no correlation to student education and have been rumored to be benefitting teachers’ personal lives.

“Our staff has been working day and night to figure out a system that can make our school a better, safer place,” assistant principal Park Matterson said. “One of the renovations includes our brand new tables in the cafeteria, which allow students to maintain their distance indoors.”

The shipments of new appliances to renovate the school began with the round tables to maintain the previous Center for Disease Control social distancing protocols. Administrators also implemented the touchless water bottle stations, which ensures hydration to learners while preventing the spread of germs. 

“We’re only just getting started,” Matterson said, promising more improvements to the school.

But not all students believe the improvements are helping. 

“The new cafeteria tables are nice, but there’s not enough seating,” junior Theo Ulysses said. “I’ve had to sit on the floor with my friends since we returned in January.” 

And things have not improved. The first shipment that made students question the relevance to education and safety was when Principal Lichelle Muttrell began ordering golden bidets and complementary mini fridges in every ‘staff only’ bathroom.

“We have leaky toilets, sinks that are incapable of turning on for longer than two seconds, and broken stalls in our school bathrooms, meanwhile the teachers are living in luxury,” Ulysses said. “During school hours, the 7/11 down Catoctin is the only place where I can use the bathroom without a flood emerging under the toilet seat, and I actually have a working sink to wash my hands.” 

Administrators argued that the faculty upgrades, including the workroom’s newest disco ball, are necessary in order to manage the pressure faculty is under due to students back in school institutions this year. 

“The new disco ball brings me back to my college days,” P.E. teacher Sue McGue said. “It helps me burn off stress caused by the pandemic.” 

Students have expressed their disapproval of Muttrell’s teacher workroom remodel, specifically because of the disruption it has caused in active classrooms. According to an informal poll held during advisory, 93.8% of students in the school building have lost focus due to the heavy metal blasting in the workroom.

“No matter if I am in the science wing, history and English hallway, or math department, the sounds of teachers cheering and partying echo through my classrooms,” senior George Clementine said. “Last week when I walked by, strobe lights were everywhere and the fog machine was pouring clouds out the workroom door.”

Students have also indicated that the teachers’ new distractions are preventing teachers from lesson planning and grading. “My government class has been a study hall for three classes,” Ulysses said. “I expect to come to school and learn, yet my teachers are taking no responsibility in the classroom.”

Teachers have explained that they must have the right tools for their workrooms in order to be prepared to teach. History teacher Liz McWhite also indicated that the newest edition to the teacher’s lounge helps her keep energy throughout the day. 

“We had a buffet of Panda Express on Monday, Mexican on Tuesday, and Chick-fil-a on Wednesday,” McWhite said. “The variety of the food each day makes going to school a priority for me.”

As a result of the teachers’ daily gourmet buffet, students tried to protest outside the teacher’s lounge, but they were sent back to class with a tardy slip through e-hallpass. 

“I can’t bring lunch to school, so I’m forced to eat the rancid meals that the cafeteria serves,” Clementine said. “The teachers have every different variation of food,  while the chicken we eat everyday in the cafeteria probably isn’t even real meat.”

Matterson insisted that students have been eating the cafeteria food for years and mentioned that a change in their meals is not essential for improving the school. 

“After being sent to the nurse to have seating during my lunch period, I peered into Muttrell’s office and got a glimpse of her brand new jacuzzi,” McQueen said. “Every administrator was inside of it and they all had milkshakes in their hands.” 

After the student body was made aware of the jacuzzi, students were driven over the edge. On Friday, March 11, 2022, over 200 students raided the administrative offices to make their voices heard and stand up to the faculty. 

“The adrenaline rush was insane, we all piled into the offices and ended the mission by flipping Muttrell’s jacuzzi,” Ulysses said. “We make up this institution and we need to fight back in order to make school a learning community again.”

In order to address the ongoing student body’s concerns, SCA leaders organized a silent protest on the front lawn to promote learning in the classroom again. 

“It went on till the last bell of the day because teacher’s weren’t aware due to the blaring heavy metal and jacuzzi partying,” Clementine said. “It was such a powerful movement, we all crowded on the lawn in the name of education.”