LCHS to be demolished

Often referred to as the 8th wonder of the world, Loudoun County High School is set to be demolished this summer. This shocking news came from a statement from the school board last night.

Revered at the time of construction as the greatest architectural achievement since the pyramids, LCHS has been a pillar of American ingenuity since the time of its construction in 1954.

With its four iconic tuscan columns and rows of windows facing to the south like an army of strong soldiers, how could anyone want to tear down this noble structure?

That doesn’t even mention the iconic cupola. Although rumored to be slightly unstable, this cupola, which is the culmination of the workings of Islamic architects in the 8th century and is adorned by four decorative fiberglass urns, is a showcase of human ingenuity that deserves to be preserved, not destroyed.

Above all, this is a school of tradition. From the annual gas-leak scare to flooding bathrooms, it’s simply a crime to tear down this beloved structure.

The school board is claiming that their reason for wanting the school to be demolished is for student and staff safety. Who cares if there happens to be traces of asbestos in the walls, or if the water fountains break from time to time? This building is teeming with school pride. One look at the hallways during spirit week confirms this. Who would want to take that away?

The demolition process will begin in late June and end in mid-August. Although it hasn’t been officially decided what will become of the site after County is gone, ideas mentioned by school board members included a free-range petting zoo, a Las Vegas Raiders team store, or the world’s eighth largest ball of twine.

Is this some sort of cruel joke? None of these options could ever come close to replicating the majesty of this building. It’s like knocking down the Eiffel tower to build a Popeyes.

Adding to the madness, in order to save money in the demolition process, the school board is allowing students and staff to help demolish the school as part of the county’s “publicly funded rage room project,” or PFRRP for short. Participants will be given a sledge hammer and one hour to demolish as much of the school as possible. This is ridiculous. Any kind of sicko who wants to take part in demolishing this great building should be ashamed of themself. County has been a source of jealousy for every other school in Northern Virginia.

The School board gave no indication as to where it will transfer all of County’s students, but any other school is bound to feel like a hamster cage compared to the Taj Mahal that is LCHS.

When one thinks about the year 1954, several things will come to mind. The Eisenhower Administration. The invention of the wiffle-bat. Loudoun County High School. Take away the fact that President Eisenhower has been dead for over fifty years, and trying to imagine life without one of these things is nearly impossible.

Great American architecture has always been in notably short supply. The golden gate bridge isn’t actually gold, and the Empire State Building has just never felt tall enough. So why anyone would take one of these few great structures away is beyond understanding. But apparently, nothing is sacred, and this proud building will be reduced to a pile of rubble in the coming months.